What is the secret to a healthy and happy relationship? We’ve all heard that things such as great communication, compatibility and compassion are a few of the components to living happily ever after with your significant other. However, according to a new study, there is a surprising addition to the list: regularly ragging on your partner.
The study, conducted at Appalachian State University, found that a certain strategy had to be executed for this public roasting to be successful. Basically, it has to be done on purpose and also with a sense of humor.
“Make sure that not only your personalities mesh, but your humors do too—so no one takes offense, feels hurt, or gets defensive,” celebrity dating coach and podcast host of Man Whisperer, Laurel House told Cosmopolitan.
If you start ragging on your lover for snoring or being indecisive, make sure they are laughing along with you. If they don’t find your jabs quite so funny, you should probably consider toning down your snarkiness ASAP.
House suggested a slew of ways that roasting your significant other can improve your relationship. First off, it helps you celebrate each other quirks and have fun with each other. “When you roast each other’s quirks, you are effectively pointing out the little, sometimes ignored sides to your personalities," says House. "Those quirks tend to be the things that you love the most about your partner.”
It also helps you form a deeper connection, as it serves as in inside joke between the two of you. “If you ask the roaster what they find most attractive about their partner, there’s a good chance it could be the exact same thing that they roast them over,” says House.
And then there is the added fun in provides, as humor makes the world feel a little less stressful. It can also stimulate endorphins, and lead to some fun in the bedroom.
She also suggests that it improve intimacy and can give you an opportunity on calling them out on their issues in a non-threatening way. “Bringing up problems in this fashion helps you to softly address the hard stuff. Often times, just by shedding light on an issue can let your partner know you’re not into it.”
On that note, let the roasting begin!
READ NEXT: The Divorce Rate In America Is Dropping Fast