Everyone’s heard of it, they know that they should be aware of it, but how many people out there actually know what it means? Or better yet, know how it's going to impact their day-day-day life, both personally and professionally? Of course, we are talking about all the crazy, bizarre, and insane things that usually happens whenever Venus goes into retrograde.
We know you’ve heard of it, but just like the rest of the Internet, you might not know what it actually means. But believe it or not, this planetary phenomenon is worth paying attention to. While the most retrograde planet – Mercury – tends to mess up our technology and lines of communication, Venus is a different kind of gal. Whenever Venus starts spinning her wheels, it's actually supposed to be a time for rebrith and re-centering oneself. But that’s not always the case, especially for moms and dads. There are actually a lot of nuances when things don’t simply align.
Venus takes 225 days to complete its orbit; it is never more than 47 degrees from the Sun. Every 18 months, Venus reverses into retrograde motion, slowing down and testing relationships. In 2018, the retrograde began on October 5th and will come back around on November 16. As noted on astrostyle.com,
“It’s not that successful couples don’t have conflict, because they do. It’s how they work through it that determines the strength of their relationship.”
With that being said, here’s everything you need to know about Venus in Retrograde and 20 ways how the planet of love may be impacting our parenting. Take a look at our list below and let us know what you think!
20 No Privacy… Ever
Let’s face it: it doesn’t matter if Venus is in retrograde or not, it’s really hard for a mama to get some privacy in her life. But because Venus brings love into your life, this is when your children will want to spend the most time with you. As Café Astrology likes to put it, “As the planet of love and values, Venus retrograde periods are times when we reassess what and who we value.” In other words, you can forget about ever spending two minutes alone in the bathroom now, or for the next 18 years for that matter.
19 He Can’t Find His Lovey
Believe it or not, Venus in Retrograde might also be the reason why everything is popping up all of a sudden, even though you could have sworn that it was either lost, stolen, or simply just missing under the couch, like your son’s beloved stuffed animal or “lovey,” or any of his favorite toys. Intergralastrology writes,
“Venus is known for a time when we’re more likely to run into old friends and lovers, and also when we may find things of value which we had forgotten about or had lost. The common thread is becoming reacquainted with something or someone of value.”
18 Let’s Co-Sleep Every Night
When Venus is in retrograde, it’s a good opportunity for you to take a little time to light a fire in your marriage again, especially if you have been very preoccupied with your baby, family, and everyday life these days. Café Astrology also says that Venus in retrograde is, at the same time, “a period that many astrologers consider inopportune for getting married or starting a new relationship.”
Time to reflect, not jump to action!
So yes, you might be thinking about your marriage, but your toddler has other plans for you. That’s because he or she wants you to co-sleep with them tonight, and not with the partner you married. Sorry, mama.
17 He Caught You Digging In His Halloween Candy
Venus in Retrograde means that you have to start thinking about your own needs before everyone else’s for a change. Well, needless to say, self-care is important. And putting your needs in front of your child’s once in a while won’t hurt anyone, especially if that means digging through their Halloween candy for all the good stuff before anyone else touches it. Bustle writes,
“Venus in retrograde is a good time to reassess and rediscover our values. Who do we appreciate? What do we like and appreciate around us?”
We’ve got the answer for you: KitKats and Reese’s Butter Cups.
16 The Meltdowns Go In Full Gear
You know that your toddler loves you just as much as you love him or her. And sometimes they just have a hard time controlling all of that love and the emotions that go with it. Because they really love you, sometimes they have to cry about it. And yes, sometimes those meltdowns do go in full gear and there isn’t much that you can do about it other than to exercise some extreme patience. I mean, Chick Fil A gave your kid a book rather than a toy. You’d be pretty upset too, right? Like they say, this too shall pass (although it’s taking a damn long time, isn’t it?).
Venus in retrograde can cause even the most zen yogi to get irritable and combative. That said, while we try to minimize our reaction, Venus allows us to reflect on why we react the way we do.
15 Peace Of Mind
At the end of the day, the only way that you are going to take care of your family is if you take care of yourself first, right? The car won’t run unless there’s gas in it.
Even if things seem to be working backwards for you, take this 6-week period to focus on you, and just you. You won’t regret it.
“Even if you’re ruled by Venus, you might be able to appreciate the time to turn inwards and take some time off. It can be nice to let go for a while and just concentrate on yourself.”
14 More Cuddle Time… At Midnight
Because Venus in Retrograde means that you should be getting more up close and personal with your partner (especially when the lights go out), it seems like your toddler has other plans for the two of you. As much as you want to reignite that flame in your marriage, this is when your child also wants the most cuddling time… at midnight, no less. And how are you or your husband) supposed to say no? That bed is big enough for all of you, after all. Bustle writes,
“Venus retrograde can mess with your senses, and trigger impulsive feelings of love and desire.”
13 5am Wake Up Calls
Before you had kids, daylights savings time was incredible, because it meant that you could sleep an extra hour over the weekend. But now that you have kids, that doesn’t exist anymore. Here’s why. Intergralastrology writes,
“It’s interesting that, after her retrograde, Venus will no longer be the evening star but will emerge as the morning star, and this, in the old days of astrology, was thought to be a very ominous sign by some astrologers. The forty days when Venus was retrograde was initially viewed as a time to prepare for emergence as the morning star and the associated troubles.”
12 The Target Runs Aren’t So Peaceful Anymore
For a lot of moms, Target really is our home away from home, because it has everything we need, from couches to Starbucks coffee, new pajamas and an assortment of good bras and shampo.... Even a little section where we can eat breakfast, lunch or dinner. With that being said though, your Target runs (or visits, if you’re that kind of person) aren’t so peaceful during this time period (and not just because you’ve maxed out your Red Card). Intergralastrology writes,
“The general theme of Venus retrograde is the recognition of our values. This is a time to reconnect with our internal sense of what’s important to us, not to move forward and on to new things.”
11 Even The Mac-N-Cheese Isn't Right
If you are noticing that even your child is acting grumpier than before, you’re not the only one. It seems like no matter what you do or what you say, it’s just not good enough for your pre-school prince charming or little princess in the making.
Venus in Retrograde is supposed to be a time of calm and peace, right?
Wrong. Not when you bought the wrong box of Mac-N-Cheese during your last grocery store run, mama. She wanted the one with The Descendants on the cover, not the generic one. Come on, ma! You should know this stuff by now.
10 The Haves…
When you look at other moms, couples, and families, yes, you probably can’t help but think that they’ve got their entire life in order. But what you see on your Facebook and Instagram feeds don’t necessarily represent reality or what really is going on behind closed doors. Yes, Heather from the PTA’s kids might always look like they are well-dressed and her house always looks like it’s in immaculate condition, but there’s a very good chance that she might be hiding the real story in her wine cabinet.
Hey, we all need to wind down, take our bra off and put our hair up in that messy top bun, right?
9 The Have Nots….
Your life might not look as glamorous or put together as all of the other mom influencers that are on social media out there. Well, Venus in Retrograde is not the time to start putting things on your credit card or going on shopping sprees (that’s Mercury’s job). As much as these moms want you to believe that they are shopping at Whole Foods because they love their organic children, they are really getting their best deals at Aldi (but just not telling anyone about it).
8 The Keurig Stopped Working
Don’t you just hate it when, in the morning, the Keurig prompts you to descale it, when all you want is a cup of coffee so you can go about your day? Well, when Venus is in Retrograde, even some of our day to day appliances can go haywire, which means you can expect for it to stop altogether. And that’s not because you’ve been putting off the descaling part, but it’s because you might need a new one. Intergralastrology writes, “While Venus retrograde is a poor time to get things assessed, it’s not a good time to do an assessment.”
7 Endless Paw Patrol
You know how sometimes your child just wants to do something over and over and over again, nonstop? Well, there’s a reason for it, and it might have something to do with Venus being in – you guessed it – retrograde. Café Astrology puts it this way, “We are called upon to deal with relationship issues from the past during this Venus retrograde cycle. Evens occur that seem fated or predestined.” In other words, you are going to be watching endless marathons of Paw Patrol whether you like it or not. Just be happy that your little tyke isn’t insisting on watching Trolls again (the music is great, but not when that Justin Timberlake song is in your head all weekend long).
Don’t you just love it when your child gives you one of his masterpieces that he or she drew using only the finest glitter markers that you have on your leftover white printer paper? We all do. Apparently, there’s a reason why so many kids love to draw when Venus is in retrograde, and especially all over the house. And by that we mean, all over our kitchen walls, hallway, furniture, etc. Heck, even the dog gets a makeover! Intergralastrology says,
“Venus rules the arts, and her retrograde is not a great time to begin new artistic endeavors, and it is a particularly risky time to buy a piece of art.”
5 Grandma’s Suddenly Gone MIA
Because you gave up on your babysitter over the summer (she just couldn’t make it on time, now could she?) and the nanny wasn’t working out (because you know she’s been illegally using your Netflix and HBO Go passwords at her house, among other things) you’ve decided to rely on Grandma for help, but now she’s gone missing, too.
Why? Because Venus is in retrograde and she’s decided to go on an all-inclusive Beaches resort vacation with her new boyfriend, Stanley. And she just told you about this 24 hours ago, too. Her love life has suddenly become very Carrie Bradshaw, hasn’t it?
4 Oreos For Lunch
Parents can be forgetful. We get it. With all of the things that happen (and unexpectedly happen) in our daily lives, Venus in Retrograde is really when we have the “just forget it” attitude the most. And by that we mean you start omitting the cucumbers and carrots from your child’s packed lunch for school and start filling it up with Oreos and even leftover Halloween candy if it’s still around the house. Because a happy child is a peaceful child and that’s what you need the most when Venus is in retrograde. Not every battle is worth fighting for, especially over vegetables.
3 The Never Ending Questions
This is the time of the year when your child truly tells you that he or she loves you and that they also care for you, too. In fact, they care about your mental health so much that they keep asking your puzzling and brainstorming questions that you just can’t find the right answers to.
But hey, at least your kid is keeping you on your toes by asking you Jeopardy-like questions that would even stump Alex Trebek (like why Bert and Ernie are just roommates, among other things).
Remember mama, just breathe and Google everything on your phone.
2 Nap Time Becomes What Time?
Venus in retrograde means that we should be thinking about our love life, our relationships and what’s most important to us in our lives, right? Well, that doesn’t seem to be the case with our kids. As much as you want to spend a little alone time with your partner during your child’s scheduled nap times over the weekends, it’s not going to happen. That’s because this is when nap time becomes it doesn’t exist time and all three of you need to hang out in the living room and watch Disney Pixar’s Coco for the 11thtime in the row, ok? Your toddler wouldn’t have it any other way.
1 But At The End Of The Day….
It doesn’t matter what the planets are doing up in the universe, because at the end of the day your kids still love you. That’s right. With all the meltdowns, the demands, the endless crying, the missing socks and shoes, the husband who can’t find his iPhone and the dog who keeps on peeing on the carpet, this is still your home, your family. And Venus might not tell you this directly, but she knows that you wouldn’t have it any other way. The dishes can wait. The laundry won’t go anywhere. Venus in retrograde is here to tell you to screw it all and just breathe, mama.