Being a parent is a lot of work but being a mom is exhausting. We know that mothers often carry the bulk of the mental and physical load of parenting, not only organizing the family calendar and scheduling all the appointments but typically doing the bulk of the housework as well. It’s no wonder moms are overstressed and overtired, and often lose their patience at the end of a long day.
One busy and tired mom recently took to Facebook to write a post reminding all the dads and partners out there that parenting is a two-person job and men shouldn’t be waiting for women to tell them what they need them to do and instead learn to be a lot more proactive around the house.
“Dear Dads,” Jessica Hammett began her post. “Don’t wait. Don’t wait until she tells you what to do. Don’t wait until the dishes are piled up. Don’t wait until the kids are so loud that you can’t think straight. Don’t wait until she looks exhausted. Don’t wait until she’s angry cleaning or quiet yelling. Don’t wait until it’s past dinner time and kids haven’t eaten. Don’t wait until it’s after bath time. Don’t wait until she’s screaming like a lunatic.”
She reminded all the dads reading that moms always need help, despite their insistence that they don’t. “She needed you the most when she said, “no, I got it.” Hammett wrote. She went on to add that while dads often wait for the mom to tell them what to do, moms simply need no instructions. Moms just do what needs to be done and they don’t need to be told. “She’s running this ship alone while you wait to be told what to do. She is hoping one day you don’t await her instructions, and you just do the thing that needs to be done.
Hammett reminds those dads that they need to stop waiting to be told what to do. “By the time she asks for help, she’s already submerged in the rough sea of motherhood, gasping for air and hoping for a life ring to be tossed her way. So don’t wait.”
Many commended Hammett for writing the post, adding their own comments. “Also, don’t wait... because you are an adult and part of this household. It’s not “her” job. They’re your kids too, it’s your house too. If you eat, you should help. If you wear clothes, you should help,” wrote one commenter. “And guys!! Help us mommas..and just do it.. don't expect us to pat you on the back or clap or acknowledge the amazing job you just did! I appreciate it I really do..but you shouldn't need recognition for being a decent human, father and husband and helping,” wrote another.
“And then there's us single parents, who do it alone, all day every day,” wrote one mom. “I salute parents everywhere. If you aren't doing it alone, you should never feel like you are! No one should feel like a single parent when they are in a relationship.”
Parenting is a tough job but it's made even tougher when moms have to do double duty. Do you agree with Hammett's post?