Becoming a mother means sacrificing a lot of time to dedicate to your children. You, of course, want to ensure that they're getting enough love and attention to allow them to grow into the self-sufficient humans you'd like them to be. By raising them well, this means you will be giving a lot of your own energy up. But, it's incredibly vital to make time for yourself so you don't lose yourself in motherhood. It's very difficult, between feeling guilty for taking time for yourself and also finding an hour or two to get away; however, life's a balance. This does not change when you become a parent. So, here are 10 important reasons to remind you why getting some you time is vital to be a great parent.
It's hard to instill an independent nature in your children if you're always around. Regardless of who is taking care of your children, it's important for you to sneak away for an hour or two for their own mental freedom. It's important for children to feel "bored". This allows their own creative minds to flow. If they were constantly stimulated, they would never be able to have independent thought. So, get outta there; for your kid's sake!
Now that's we've assured you how important it is to get away from the kids every once in a while for their sake, it's incredibly important for your own, too. I know some days all you feel like is "parent", but it's important to be a self-sufficient, independent human being without having to spread your energy thin by caring for your child/children. It's important to have some "you" time by yourself, without children, for your own independent's sake.
When you are out without the care of other, little humans, you have the mental space to care about other things; to think of other things! Imagine! It's life's simple pleasures that matter most to a lot of us, and by escaping "parenthood" even for an hour or two, it will allow yourself to ground your feelings without the responsibility of caring for anyone (within reason) but yourself. It's liberating, it's exciting and it's sure important.
When you have the responsibility of watching your children, it can be difficult to get certain, personal things done. Like going to the doctor's office or getting your teeth cleaned, the little and necessary things may seem luxurious when you're child-free.
But, consider how vital these appointments can be. It's important to become comfortable with separating from your children every now and again. Even if it's to go shopping for new lingerie, which you wouldn't want your children there for, it's important for you to get some you-time.
When you welcome parenthood, you often say goodbye to your weekly friend hangouts. Sometimes, you say goodbye to a friendship that does not really fit your new mold as a parent. It's absolutely bittersweet to see a friendship disappear due to new values and morals; but, it's incredibly important not to let a friendship fizzle just because of your new lifestyle. It's important for both you and your friendships to do what you can to see each other as often as you can. We're not suggesting you go for weekly coffee dates if it's not feasible, but what we are saying is that it's important to put some energy into seeing each other when you can.
To touch back upon the independence idea, it's important to allow the child to know it's ok if you're not around constantly. This will raise their courage to be a little more self-sufficient, age permitting. Even at a young age, it's nice to have your infant/toddler used to the surroundings of other adults for social skills and comfort reasons. There may be times where you must leave the house without your child; so, the more they are comfortable around another adult supervisor, the better and easier it is for you to get some alone time.
This one is dedicated to you, Mom. It's hard to self-identify other than mother, in general, once you take on parenthood. You're constantly being pulled in multiple directions trying to tend to the needs of many people. So, we advise you get out there and remember what you're passionate about. Say you did not have any specific hobbies pre-babies- well then, find some! Go out and do a pottery class. Try Yoga. Do an activity you wouldn't usually to get in touch with your new-found passions.
Life is essentially for the connection with other human beings. When we connect, we learn about others as well as ourselves. It's important not to lose this type of connection when we become parents. Parenthood can be incredibly isolating; if we let it.
So, it's important to keep our connection with the outside world alive and well. And, we're not talking about FaceTime calls or DM's off Instagram. We mean real-life, face-to-face connections with other adults and like-minded individuals.
Ok- this one does not mean to offend. But, let's be real: it's hard to enjoy most meals (to their fullest) while we're tending to other, little humans. It can be a pain to try and make a nice meal for everyone, let alone feel confident that they'll each finish their plate. It's a nice experience to get out, alone, to have a meal solo. We're talking: no interruption with whines, cries and/or sibling fistfights. Plus, no throwing of food. It's important to build a relationship with food that you once had. One where it was not limited to consuming the leftovers and/or scraps of the meals your children did not finish... again.
Some mothers feel as though they've lost themselves in motherhood. This is a general statement, as some mothers also fall deeply in love with their new lifestyle. While some may love their day-to-day, others may not know how their life suddenly changed along with their self-care and self-worth. It's important to step away from family-life, even if it's an hour a week, to get some solid alone time to remember who you were before motherhood.