Relentless Positivity Can Be A Type Of Victim-Blaming For Moms


In this day and age where mom shaming in something that happens on Instagram, in Facebook groups, the school pickup line and everywhere in between, so many women have decided that enough is enough and are moving forward down another path. The positivity path to be exact. Instead of putting each other down on the playground, moms everywhere have started building each other up and becoming the ultimate cheerleaders for their best mom pals. This is awesome...to a degree.

It almost seems that as a whole, society has shifted to believe that positivity is a one-size-fits-all kinda thing and while there is definitely an emotion changing, confidence level that it can bring - there's another side to it as well. In fact, research is showing that relentless positivity can also result in victim blaming, too.

We are taught from a young age that an optimistic outlook can change your whole attitude, mood and result in great things in life. However, under certain circumstances, constant positivity can actually be detrimental to our health instead.

A most recent study, done in 2007 by the University of Virginia psychologist Shigehiro Oishi, University of Illinois psychologist Ed Diener and Michigan State University psychologist Richard Lucas reinforces these concerns. To conduct their research, they analyze many large international samples and found that while many very happy people are the successful ones when it comes to interpersonal relationships and volunteer work, people who were moderately happy were more successful than the extremely happy people financially and educationally and are also more politically active.

What does this mean exactly? Well, their findings suggest that while positive attitudes do allow us to push forward and achieve big goals that we set for ourselves, this attitude can also foster complacency in life. Definitely food for thought here.

Yes, positive thinking can help us to take the necessary risks in life and even try new things, there are groups of people who turn to worry as a natural coping mechanism. And of course, if you are thinking too positively that you're ignoring dangerous things, that's pretty scary, too.

Moral of the story: listen, talk to your bffs and be a cheerleader when you know they need a boost, instead of cheering on every little thing just because.

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