Let’s face it: every relationship needs a fine tune up from time to time. Just like a well-taken care of house, maintenance is always required. And your relationship or your marriage isn’t any different. If you feel as though things might be drifting apart between you and your partner, luckily there are several different ways than you can reconnect with your spouse. Here are just a few ways you can work things out while you still can.
1. Talk About Your Feelings
If you are having problems communicating, the dominoes will begin to fall and not in a good way at all. If you see that there are several issues arising, take some time out and talk about your feelings. Be open to discussing change or finding a solution to a problem. And most importantly, listen. Listening to what your partner has to say might be more beneficial than talking over him or her.
2. Focus On Your Marriage
When a newborn baby enters the picture, it can be very easy to lose focus on what’s important for you and your partner. And believe it or not, it’s your marriage that should always come first. If you are not happy or if your partner is not happy, chances are that there might be cracks in your foundation, and that’s certainly something you don’t need for your family. Put your spouse first by connecting with him or her, on both a physical and mental level.
3. Focus On Why You Fell In Love
Should things fall to the wayside – and more than often it does, especially with a newborn baby in the picture – focus on why you fell in love in the first place. It might be hard trying to adjust yourself to your baby’s new sleeping pattern or life as a parent. But remember that your marriage is the foundation of everything you’ve built so far. Take a walk down memory lane, look at old pictures or just reminisce about those first few dates.
4. The Importance Of Date Night
You might not feel as though you want to get dressed, brush your hair and put makeup on after giving birth to your baby. But for some moms, it’s exactly what they need. Having date night with your partner will make you feel like your old self again and also remind you that the new family that you have now is because of the relationship you have with your partner.
5. Schedule At-Home Date Nights
If you can’t find a suitable babysitter or if the grandparents live too far away, schedule at-home date nights. It can be something simple as cooking your partner’s favorite meal, watching a movie together or just sitting outside in the back porch and watching the stars… until one of you falls asleep!
6. Set Time Apart For Yourselves
This might be difficult for some, but for others all it takes is just 15 minutes a day to reconnect with your spouse. Whether it’s during coffee in the morning, or on the couch after everyone has fallen asleep, just a little cuddle or a hug could go along way and it can remind your spouse that you are here for them.
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7. Take Back Your Bed
While there’s nothing wrong if your child co-sleeps with you and your partner in the same bed, if your baby is truly getting in the middle of things, it’s time to reconfigure your situation. Take back your bed if you need to and remember that your relationship with your partner comes first. Intimacy is just as important after pregnancy as it was before.
8. Get Spiritual
It doesn’t matter if you practice one religion or not, but there are several different ways that you can get spiritual. In other words, it’s all about mind over body. Sign up for a yoga class together. Try mediation. You can also awaken your senses – and your relationship – by doing something simple like going for a walk together with the baby in his or her stroller.
9. Don’t Neglect Yourself
And while it’s very important to do things with your partner, don’t forget about yourself and your own needs. As they say, one happy wife equals a happy life. Go get a manicure and pedicure. Heck, do a little retail therapy if you need to. The only way you will be able to reconnect in your relationship is if you reconnect with your own self, first.
10. Remember His Needs, Too
With that being said, don’t forget about him and his personal needs, too. After all, going from the two of you to the three of you is a huge adjustment for all. There’s a chance that he might not communicate his feelings, his fears, or simply tell you how exhausted he may be feeling as well. If he’s a hands-on father, let him know just how much you appreciate him and all the work he does. And remember, dads deserve recognition and maybe even a little reward on the side, too!