A Minnesota brother and sister held nothing back after the death of their mother recently. The siblings penned a scathing obituary that has quickly gone viral and elicited a very lengthy debate online as to whether an obituary is appropriate venue to air family secrets and scandals.
Kathleen Dehmlow died May 31 in Springfield at the age of 80. Her obituary has quickly gone viral after two of her children made it very clear that they will not be missing their mother, and the reasons why they're so angry.
Published in the Redwood Falls Gazette, the obituary begins with standard information including her date of birth, when she married her husband Dennis Dehmlow and that the couple had two children, Gina and Jay.
Paragraph 1: ok— Stu (@RandBallsStu) June 5, 2018
Paragraph 2: ok
Paragraph 3: wait
Paragraph 4: OH
Paragraph 5: *airplane flies overhead with a banner reading WELCOME TO HELL MOM* pic.twitter.com/ppV45htrda
It is then that the obituary then reveals that Kathleen got pregnant with her then husband's brother.
"In 1962 she became pregnant by her husband’s brother Lyle Dehmlow and moved to California. She abandoned her children, Gina and Jay who were then raised by her parents in Clements, Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Schunk."
In a rather harsh ending to the obituary, it's written that she will "now face judgement" for her actions, and that neither Gina nor Jay will miss their mother as 'they understand that this world is a better place without her.”
People had a lot of thoughts about this obituary, with many thinking it was definitely not the time for the family to air their grievances.
Let us say half of these allegations are true. 100% unnecessary. Shame to those that published this trash.— David Bellavia (@DavidBellavia) June 5, 2018
I understand what she did was wrong in paragraph 3 and 4, but that 5th paragraph? That's cold!— J.D. Elliott (@jde4zion) June 5, 2018
Others were supportive of the message.
It takes courage to tell the truth. Just because someone is dead, doesn’t mean they become a saint, and there’s no rule saying a child must forgive an abusive, unloving parenthttps://t.co/0eSKoSVnbG— hereforthedoughnuts (@groth_rubini) June 5, 2018
Best obit ever. Don’t hold back Gina and Jay, what’s really on your mind.— BMW DB (@acrimoniousmofo) June 5, 2018
Relative Dwight Dehmlow told the Star Tribune that while some of the obituary was true, a lot of the facts were missing.
“The sad thing about this is there is no rebuttal. There is more to it than this. It’s not simple.”
“She made a mistake 60 years ago, but who hasn’t?” he said. “Has she regretted it over the years? Yes.”
Some even questioned how the obituary was published in the first place, calling out the newspaper for allowing it. It seems however that many at the paper was against publishing the obituary but they were "overruled."
The manager of the Redwood Falls Gazette spoke to HuffPo and stated that the obituary ran because it was paid to be run. She didn't comment on whether people at the paper had opposing views on it running or not.
The obituary, printed on Monday, had gone viral by Tuesday. Publications such as USA Today, the Washington Post, Fox News the NY Postand NBC ran the story that even went international. By Tuesday after noon the Redwood Falls Gazette had removed the obituary, as had the website Legacy.com.
Dwight Dehmlow feels that whomever wrote this obituary 'decided to go out with hate'. “This is going to hurt a lot of people,” he said.