A woman recently took to Reddit to ask for advice on how to deal with her husband, who refuses to allow their young children to be vaccinated.It will never not boggle our minds that in the year 2019, with all of the medical technology and advancements we've had for literal centuries, there are still people in the world, IN THIS COUNTRY, who refuse to vaccinate their kids. Vaccines are one of the safest and most effective ways to prevent myriad dangerous and potentially deadly diseases. Diseases that, in many cases, have been eradicated or controlled to the point of non-danger. That is, until now.
Now, thanks to some shoddy and irresponsible research and a growing number of keyboard doctors, epidemiologists, and medical experts, we're seeing outbreaks of vaccine-preventable illnesses all over the country. These outbreaks out untold numbers of people at risk, and still, there is a contingent of people who refuse to see reason and evidence and instead rely on YouTube videos and debunked science. It's one thing to disagree with a woman in your town's Facebook page on vaccines - it's quite another when the person putting your kids at risk by refusing to vaccinate is their own parent. This one is an infuriating read.
The poster starts by saying both she and her husband are vaccinated, as is everyone in their family. When they first had children, her husband wanted to delay vaccines until their first baby was a bit older - his reasoning was that he wanted to wait to "add chemicals", which should have been poster's first red flag.
When they baby was a year old, she brought it up again, and was faced with more resistance. Even after a medical scare with their daughter, and being chastised by the doctor who treated her, the father still refuses to consent to the kids being vaccinated.
Their kids are now 6 and 3 1/2, and it sounds like poster is fed up and looking for support on how to do the right thing. The right thing being vaccinating their kids! The husband goes to every doctor's appointment and has kept this from happening up until now, so poster is asking if she should just do it without telling him. And you know what? YES SHE SHOULD. This is the health of her children, and the health of everyone else who has to share the same air as her kids.
Many of the commenters on Reddit had a similar response, and lots brought up the fact that her husband sounds incredibly controlling (agreed). She doesn't need his permission, and quite frankly, it doesn't sound like he's someone that can be reasoned with. The fact that he reneged on his promise to vaccinate them already is very telling.
The original posted took to Reddit again to update that she did go behind her husband's back and have her kids vaccinated after her child developed a fever.
She writes, "Well guys, I did it last week. I started vaccines. I took them to our county medical office on a day that accepted walk-ins, we waited and they got the first round, about 4 combos each, with another walk-in suggested to me for 3-6 months to catch up the rest."
She continues," hey cried so hard! The oldest kept crying off and on for an hour afterwards, so I took them to a Chick-fil-A for ice cream and playing to distract them. I took the bandaids off before we returned so my husband didn't notice."
Adding, "that whole day, before I left and when we returned, I thought somehow my husband knew, or would figure it out, but here we are about a week later and he's got no idea. And guess what? They're perfectly fine now, no complications! (As I expected, DUH)."
A third update a year later, she lets followers of this whole ordeal know that the secret is out.
"Well, it was time for the next round of shots recently," the mom shares. "The kids came home, and kept mentioning 'my poke' so he asked me if they got vaccines and I came clean. I said yes, and told him they started last year."
The mom shares that she apologized for keeping it from him and says that they had a long conversation, no yelling and "I explained the recent measles outbreaks nearby and expressed my concern for our kids."
"All is well. No, we didn’t even raise voices. Yes we kissed and made up. He understands I did things for the kids, and not against him."
We're normally all about working with your partner and being open and honest with them. But when it comes to your kids and their safety and health, all bets are off.