The mere thought of finding a babysitter can either make a new mother cringe and cry or squeal for the joy of freedom. Some mothers can't fathom leaving their little one's side while others desperately need some sort of separation to maintain an ounce of sanity. There are unique opinions for each situation, but both scenarios are absolutely normal.
Whatever the case may be, finding a babysitter who isn't a blood relative or a close friend can be hard, but is often a very necessary part of motherhood. Figuring out where to start can be an even tougher debacle - especially with all the terrifying stories in the news or frightening comments in the motherhood "support" groups on social media. Between the stories, personal experiences, and social media nightmares, making a decision on a babysitter can be seen as the "necessary evil" most parents must give in to.
"When he was a baby, I wouldn’t let anyone watch him unless it was my parents. Then I realized that’s not fair to them," explains mother of one, Heather Fargo to Moms.com. "Once I let myself open up and trust people, I now have an amazing babysitter. It's super hard to do!"
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Opening yourself up and trusting someone you barely know to watch your beloved child is not easy. For many moms, it takes time, patience, research, and a little bit of faith in humanity before the nerves begin to slow.
Use Your Friends (and Your Little One's Friends)
"We used a friend's babysitter," admits mother of two, Leah Gemmati, to Moms.com via Momhood Mayhem. "She was the first non-family member to watch the kids."
If you have a friend who actively uses a babysitter, ask your friend the important questions. Ask that person how they connected with their babysitter and how her children interact with him or her. Is their babysitter open to watching new children and ask about the personality type of their sitter. What is the going pay rate and are they willing to discuss background credentials? Little questions like these are important if a long-term babysitter is what the family is seeking.
"My daughter made a Kindergarten best friend who had two older sisters. The older sister babysat until she went to college then the younger sister stepped in," says Rebecca Ames, mother of three to Moms.com. "We had three precocious kids and not just anybody was up to watching them and letting the dog out."
Finding those connections, even the ones your children make for you, can be the key to opening up and finding a way to trust.
Use The Resources You Have Available
Many parents are wary of using social media or online sites as a way to find babysitters or nannies. However, especially in the world of modern parenting, these sources have become safer and used much more often than ever before.
"There was a charge to use the full service the site had to offer, so I paid for one month and selected a few people from the responses we received," adds Alicia Marie, mother of one, regarding her experience with Care.com. "We did interviews and 'Meet and Greets with a couple of them and then chose who we wanted to rely on from there."
Sometimes throwing a few bucks out there is the best way to find trustworthy, reliable people to watch your loved one. Even though parenting can often be financially stressful, it can be more stressful when you do not trust the person caring for your little one. Taking the time and doing the research can be exactly what is needed when finding the right team to support your family.
"It was time-consuming and tedious, but we wanted to make sure we picked someone who we not only felt comfortable with but who would feel comfortable following our requests and parenting style. We also wanted to have someone who had a child of their own around the same age as our little one so they could still get some peer interaction/socialization."
Find Support On Social Media
"I posted on my personal page and got lucky," states Amy Stanton, mother of five, regarding how she found the right match for her ever-growing family.
As crazy as it seems, social media platforms can really be the system you need when seeking babysitting support. Other than Facebook parenting groups, apps such as Neighborhood Watch and Peanut are able to connect you with local moms looking for a sitter or even just a support system. Getting involved in a support group can lead to finding someone who has a connection you can work with. Making those friendships and maintaining positive interactions on social media platforms can lead to finding the babysitter who clicks perfectly with your family.
"I posted on our Neighborhood Watch Facebook page to see if there was anyone in the neighborhood," Michelle Eiselle, mother of one, explains to Moms.com. "When [our babysitter] could no longer do it, she gave us another recommendation for someone in our neighborhood."
Sometimes, the connections you make become the golden tickets needed when finding a lifelong support system and sitter for your family.
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