Although Emily Simpson might be the new housewife in Orange County, the mom and attorney hasn’t hesitated to speak freely about her struggles with fertility, suffering miscarriages, and having her children through surrogacy.
The Real Housewives of Orange County reality star revealed that she had suffered five traumatic miscarriages in four years, including the terrible loss of baby twins.
Her journey to becoming a mom was a long and painful one.
“I had all kinds of tests done, and there was no resolution. I left the fertility doctor’s office feeling really frustrated, and I didn’t resolve anything and no clue and I became frustrated with the process.”
Then, Simpson’s mother-in-law referred her to Dr. Najmabadi, a fertility doctor in Beverly Hills. “It was the first time in four years that I felt like someone gave me a ray of hope. ‘If your eggs aren’t good, we’ll get them somewhere else, if it’s your husband, we’ll give you sperm, if you need a surrogate,’” she shared.
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“’Whatever the issue is, we can solve it so that you can have children,’” Dr. Najmabadi told Simpson.
Simpson and her husband, Shane, began the in-vitro fertilization process starting in 2011. However Simpson suffered some complications including internal bleeding. She was then implanted with a boy and a girl in 2011, but the pregnancy she hoped to see through to term had a heart-breaking outcome.
“I was at Costco and I remember telling Shane, ‘I don’t feel right, something feels weird, I feel pressure.’ Next thing I knew, my water broke, and I had to go the hospital. I went into labor and had to give birth to them knowing they weren’t going to live. That was devastating.”
Simpson carried her twins to about four months before going into early labor, and suffered an emergency D&C and blood transfusion following the birth.
“It was a horrible time period for me, sometimes when I think about it, there aren’t even words to articulate the awful, horrible feeling of pain, desperation and trauma over and over and over. I just kept going.”
While she was still suffering mental and physical trauma from the loss of twins, Simpson's sister Sara made an incredible offer.
“I was telling my sister about what I had gone through, and then she said to me, ‘Don’t try yourself, I’m scared for you and your health.’ And then she offered to be a surrogate,” Simpson said.
“Be careful what you’re offering, because I might take up you up on it!”
Emily and Sara moved forward with the surrogacy, which was treated as formally as any other surrogacy including contracts and attorneys, even though they were sisters.
“The process made our relationship even closer,” she shared. “People were very supportive, and amazed that my sister would do something like that, and especially with me not being there in Ohio,” Simpson said.
Simpson was implanted with two embryos, a boy and a girl, hoping for twins that her sister would carry to term.
“She was positive she was pregnant with twins, but it was only one baby and she was devastated, she was crying,” Simpson said.
Simpson’s sister, Sara, gave birth to Emily's eldest daughter, Annabelle in 2013. Sara had a daughter of her own, and she was 4 years old at the time she was carrying Annabelle.
When Annabelle was a year old, Simpson was ready to have another baby, and reached out to her sister Sara to see if she’d be able to be a surrogate once again.
“She told me ‘no’. I was like, ‘I respect your opinion, I don’t want to force you,’” Simpson shared.
Simpson and her husband began researching hiring a surrogate. “I realized I was really spoiled with my sister, and now having to go through an agency and there more red tape. I was really bummed by the whole process. So I ended up calling my sister and asked her again, and I talked her into it!”
This time, doctors implanted two male embryos; thankfully, they took. Sara had some complications with the boys with early labor signs. “I remember lying on the couch in the fetal position waiting to hear back from the hospital,” she admitted. Luckily, doctors were able to stop the early labor and contractions.
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Thank you to all of you beautiful women who have reached out to me and shared your stories of #infertility, loss and pain. My heart is with all of you and know that you are not alone ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ ********* If anyone is ever interested in discussing #adoption or getting more information regarding #fostercare, please follow and reach out to my amazing friend @james_mercer_phd who owns several adoption agencies and is an expert in the area of adoptions and foster care. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ ********** Love, hope, light and hugs to all you beautiful friends out there! Xoxo Emily #rhoc #womenempowerment #emmys2018 #womeninspiringwomen #rhod #lonestaradoptionservices
Emily’s two twin boys, Luke and Keller, were born at 35 weeks. While Luke was born healthy, Keller ended up staying in the NICU for two weeks before being released from hospital.
Despite all of the challenges, Simpson is grateful to her husband who helped her get through her journey to motherhood. “The one thing that kept me going was that my husband was always on board, and supportive throughout,” she said.
Shane has two daughters from his first marriage, Shelby, 17, and Chanel 12.
“My husband’s family is very supportive too, and my sister of course for being there for me, and being a surrogate. I had a wonderful group of people around me. I was really lucky having everyone on my side.”
“I had spent my entire life wanting to be a mother, and even though I tried later in my life in my 30s, all the things I had done and accomplished prior to that were all because some day I wanted to be a mother, and provide a safe and secure environment for children,” Simpson said.
“I knew that’s what I wanted and I was going to do anything possible to get it.”