Moms remain as one of the most important figures throughout children’s development and long after they’re all grown up. Although mother-daughter relationships tend to have the stigma of being full of conflicts, especially during the teenage years, your guidance is very crucial to your growing girl.
With a changing body, school schedule and mindset, the teenage years can be very hectic and confusing to a young girl. Additionally, many societies of today continue to put an absurd amount of pressure on girls to act and look a certain way, and it’s up to you as a mother to direct them to the right mindset.
We’ve compiled a handy list of advice to consider when talking with your teenage daughter.
10 Don’t Be Afraid to Say No
Often, many teenage girls feel pressured to be compliant, whether it’s at school, with their friends, or with a significant other. While being agreeable improves one’s overall charisma, it’s crucial to let her know it’s okay to say no.
Of course, most girls will have heard countless lectures at school about saying no to drugs, and that shouldn’t be the crux of your advice. Focus on telling your daughter that it’s important to feel comfortable doing the things that she agrees to do. Whether it’s a sexual activity, helping a friend, or even doing something for an authority figure. Make sure she understands that saying no and talking it out is perfectly okay.
9 Be Confident
When girls hit age 13, it seems like their self-confidence decreases by threefold. All of a sudden, they don’t feel like children anymore, but not really grown up either. As a mother, you need to not only tell your daughter that it’s okay to be herself but show her your own self-confidence as well.
In the end, your daughter needs to understand that it isn’t her choice of clothing or accessories that will be remembered, but the way she holds herself. That being said, it’s understandably difficult for teenagers to accept their individuality at first. In addition to giving her this advice, make sure to praise her for good decisions.
8 Protect Yourself
As your little girl grows up, her life will be turned upside down and filled with more opportunities to practice being independent. She’ll want to go to parties, hang out with friends, and go on dates. While all of these developments are great for her confidence, mindset, and social skills, they also increase the chances of potential dangers.
Of course, you shouldn’t keep her in the house all day, but what you can do is give her some advice about self-protection in various situations. Aside from protection during potential intimate situations, you also need to talk to your daughter about what kind of situations to avoid, and how to get herself help if something unthinkable happens.
7 It’s Okay to Cry
In the modern era, many advertisements, magazines, and blogs talk about how to raise a strong woman. Indeed, raising an intelligent, perseverant, and positive-minded girl has few negatives but it’s also important to mention that part of being strong is accepting and overcoming one’s own weaknesses.
For example, if your teen is extremely upset, you need to make it apparent that it’s okay to come to you, and it’s okay to cry it out. Sometimes, the best way to get over an upsetting event is to let one’s emotions flow out, often in the form of tears. It’s important that your daughter understands that tears do not signify weakness.
6 Be Proactive
Crying isn’t the only thing your teen daughter should be doing in the event of heartbreak, a failed test, or anything else upsetting. After accepting her emotions, your daughter needs to remember to always be proactive.
Rather than listening to endless complaining about a project, person, or relationship, ask your daughter about what actions she wants to take next. One of the best pieces of advice for teenage girls is to always think about possible solutions instead of focusing on woes.
Failed a test? Make a tutoring group. Having relationship issues? See a trusted counselor or confront the problems directly. There are always solutions to every problem, your daughter just needs to be proactive.
5 Ask for Help When You Need It
Another issue with focusing on strength and independence while raising your daughter is that she may feel obligated to solve all of her problems on her own. Whether it’s a friend issue or a hard problem on a math test, many teenage girls may see themselves as a burden or being weak when asking for help. Therefore, it’s important that you make it clear to her that frankly, everyone needs help sometimes, and she shouldn’t be afraid to communicate her troubles.
To give your teen girl the push she needs, make it clear that you’re always there for her, and ask her if she needs any help before she has a chance to consider asking!
4 Education Matters
Although plenty of teen girls study hard academically throughout their lives, plenty more may feel obligated to find romance, help out in the family, or focus their attention elsewhere in their teenage years.
No matter what your own education level is, you need to tell your daughter that in the modern world, a good education will do wonders for her future. Give her examples of what successful women did with their degrees, and try to get her excited about a particular career field and job.
While happiness can’t be bought, better education will certainly boost your daughter’s chances of living a comfortable, stable life.
3 Stand Up for Yourself
Avoiding unnecessary confrontation and conflict should always be a goal in any setting. However, there are certain times when it’s absolutely necessary to stand up for yourself, especially as a teenage girl.
Although talking back to a bully or standing up to an unfair teacher may seem daunting to your daughter, it’s important that you make it clear to her that some situations more than justify confrontation.
Remind her to always remain calm and gentle but be firm in her statements as well. As always, be the model and show your daughter how to calmly handle disagreements and justify your actions!
2 Try Out Part-Time Work and Set a Budget
Except for a select few in this world, everyone needs a source of income in order to live and thrive in modern society. One of the greatest ways to collect experience and various necessary skills to succeed in the career world is to try out part-time work in high school.
Advise your daughter on what positions to try out, and help her with setting up a budget to keep track of her spending. By doing so, you’ll be leading your daughter towards taking her first steps to financial independence as well as starting her off on the right path to becoming a successful adult.
1 Always Love Yourself
Although this piece of advice is last, it’s perhaps the most crucial for your teenage daughter to understand. Throughout her journey into puberty and the subsequent adulthood, there’s a good chance that she will doubt herself and question her self worth.
Bullies, relationship issues, more challenging academics, and a changing body could all be sources of stress. It is vital that you remind your daughter that she deserves all the love you have and that she needs to learn to love herself as well. In order to overcome the many challenges of adolescence, she has to first learn to accept her flaws and be one with her inner spirit!