After having a baby, women are in an extremely fragile state. The baby doesn’t fare much better as they are new to the world and still have a mountain of needs all day every day. So, as women slowly begin to make adjustments to their lives as a new mom, while their bodies are changing back to its pre-pregnancy state— they will likely need some help and a lot of it.
I mean, we only have two hands and if they’re fully occupied—we need our spouse to lean on.
Sure, the neighbors take turns coming by each day to check on you, your in-laws pop in on the weekends to straighten up the house and cook a meal or two. But, let's face it, that just isn’t enough. Being a new mother isn’t just a few hours a day or a couple of days per week—it’s a full- time commitment. While we are busy pumping our milk, feeding the baby, trying to get some sleep, and managing to get a daily shower—at least some of the time—somebody has got to do the dirty work.
22 Fetching Diapers Becomes A Daily Duty
Back in the olden days, women didn’t have much of an issue when it came to the baby’s diapers and keeping their bottoms clean and fresh. They just used cloth diapers—the kind that you can just buy a pack of ten and sanitize them each time they got dirty. However, in the 21st century, it isn’t practical anymore.
According to Very Well Family, babies tend to use at least six diapers each twenty-four-hour period and that’s if there aren’t any additional accidents. So, Dad will absolutely have to keep those packages of diapers and wipes handy. They sure do run out quick.
21 Washing Bottles Isn't For The Faint Of Heart
Those darn bottles. It may appear to be simple to deal with the intricacies of putting a bottle together and popping it into a baby’s mouth—but the truth is it isn’t that simple at all.
Each piece has its own place and has to be put together just right to ensure that the baby is getting what they need and not taking too much air. According to How To Adult, it’s easier than ever for bacteria to fester and grow in all of the crooks and crevices of bottles. So, parents have to be very diligent at washing them, drying them and making sure they are properly sanitized.
20 Emptying Diaper Pails Becomes Second Nature
Speaking of those diapers, some are light, some are heavy and when they’re filled with baby poo. They sure do stink! For a few years, you may have fallen prey to such inventions as the Diaper Genie with its cute collection of scented bags that are supposed to suppress the smell of bodily fluids—but boy, were you wrong.
Per The Bump, only do they stink just as much as the regular canister, they forgot to mention you have to be sure to empty them out every other hour or so. Mom's SO had better get used to dumping out diaper pails faster than she can switch boobs to do feedings.
19 Taking Out The Trash May Lead To Secret Hiding Places
Trash cans are those contraptions that you can’t live without but everyone loves to hate. They are big, bulky and after a few meals, a trip to the store and some housecleaning they have to be taken out. Lately, there are the sophisticated ones with the step on levers, self-closing lids and—ever-increasing gallons of storage.
But once the baby is born, Mom simply doesn’t have time to take out the trash anymore. According to Happier Abroad, emptying trash is the least liked activity of women. If you weren’t getting much help in that department, then you won’t be missing anything anyways.
18 He'll Have A Whole New Outlook On Doing Laundry
This one may be a bummer especially for those men who are used to coming home each day to their clothes being washed daily, shirts folded and color-coded, pants hung up in order of style—and dress shirts ironed with military precision.
Now that baby is here, Dad will have to learn an entirely new language—washology. He will have to become familiar with that machine that he spent hundreds of dollars on but likely hasn’t used a day in his life. Huffington Post tells us that men hate doing laundry. So, if he doesn’t know the difference between a hot load or cold wash, wrinkle-free or perm press, then he had better learn—fast.
17 Rinsing Breastfeeding Supplies Is A Must
For many years now Dad thought that your boobs were just for your body, to hold up your bra and maybe even his viewing pleasure. But now that the newborn has arrived—well, they are taking over, never to be seen again—at least for a while. Along with that comes an entire list of supplies that have to be refilled and maintained to keep your feeding machine going and baby happy.
As per Amazon, most breast pumps have at least 9 pieces to assemble for daily usage. So, Dad will have the worst of time trying to disassemble everything, rinse it out perfectly and dry the tubing to make sure the machine doesn’t mess up and need to be replaced.
16 Buying Formula—The Dollars Add Up
Some mothers choose not to breastfeed their babies or they simply have medical issues that prevent them from doing so. All of that is perfectly fine. That’s what formula was made for. But for those Dads who have to navigate the ever-confusing world of baby formula. We feel your pain.
Going to the store to get formula is like memorizing an entire Macy’s catalog to pick out a dress. Dad will feel like he has to read an encyclopedia just to get the correct brand, correct color, correct weight with the right ingredients. According to Momtastic, there are currently over 30 baby formula brands and types on the market.
15 Mom Hasn’t Showered—And He Better Not Mention It
This is the part of being a new mom that just goes as an unspoken territory. Women don’t like it but it’s unavoidable sometimes and we just get it. It’s not that we don’t want to shower and wash our hair every day, it’s just that we can’t always put the baby down for ten minutes to do so—and if we do manage to get a break we consider ourselves lucky.
Dad simply will be repulsed since they are used to us smelling like roses all day and will likely lose their minds at the thought of us smelling like sweat and milk. Alphamom notes new moms typically miss showers least several times per week.
14 The Dinner Dishes Won't Clean Themselves
Sure, many of you in the modern world have a dishwashing machine and don’t have to worry about touching a dish other than eating off of it, putting it away and sticking it in the slots. Some SOs, on the other hand, may not even know how to turn the thing on or let alone put the correct detergent in their to get the dishes sparkling clean.
But, just as he can use soap and water to wash his behind—he will have to learn to do the same thing to get those dishes clean—in a controlled environment that is. According to Time, only 19 percent of men admit to helping with housework.
13 Making Bottles—Even At 2 AM
Now this one isn’t rocket science but unfortunately, an obscene amount of people mess this one up—even with the best intentions. WebMD reports that the instructions clearly say, with those nice little pictures to match that you have to mix one scoop of formula for every two ounces of water—or something to that effect.
So, after you have shown Dad this once, twice, and three times—he should have it memorized and good for him if he does. But we promise not to get upset if he doesn’t remember it after the first week because formula imbalance can cause the baby gastrointestinal issues -- and yes, our fingers are totally crossed behind our backs.
12 Grocery Shopping Is Dad's Job For Now
A grocery list may be a foreign concept to a man but it will be something has to undoubtedly get etched into his memory. And if for some reason he can’t then there is an app that will be of some assistance. According to Daily Mail, men spend the least amount of time at the grocery store compared to their female counterparts.
Ever seen that guy, who befriends you in the sugar aisle and talks your head off so you can’t escape. That’s because his wife sent him and he has no idea what the hell he is looking for.
11 We're Out Of Diapers—Again
So, you are already well aware that when the baby comes out they use a lot of diapers. But one thing you’ll quickly notice is that they can be quite expensive too. So, when your SO asks you what the budget is for baby supplies this week it would be in your best interest to play coy and say you don’t know.
According to Quora, if you want tushes protection that won’t leak every time it gets soaked then it’s going to cost at least $30 dollars a pop, that’s for a box of 120 last time we checked—because the bigger size boxes have less content.
10 Who's Taking The Kids To School?
If this isn’t your first go-round having a child then Dad may know a bit about what he’s in for. Hopefully, if you do your kids are old enough to explain the daily school, soccer practice, dance recital, choir rehearsal schedule to him.
If not, you’re probably going to need to write it down on a list, stick another copy on his dashboard, program the addresses into his phone and send him texts throughout the day so he doesn’t forget the pickup times. The Washington Post reports Dads forget to pick up their children at least once every month.
9 Doing All The Things
One thing that men just don’t get is everything we do behind the scenes to keep the engine running smoothly. We have to do the dishes, do the laundry, cook, clean—buy toiletries, household items, cart the kids to sleepovers and then some. Well for six long weeks, lady—you won’t have to do any of that.
By the time the postpartum period is up, he will feel like he was a domestic servant and will be singing your praises by the time he gets to return to normal. According to Daily Mail, women spend on average 12 hours per week on domestic duties.
8 What Are Friends?
So, Dad's schedule usually goes a little something like this: go to work, spend time with wife, play with kids for a few, eat dinner, get ready for work tomorrow, hang out with buddies a few nights per week, rinse and repeat. Well, not anymore. He’s going to be so busy doing everything that his loving wife isn’t able to, making sure he isn’t neglecting his kids, and trying to keep up with work each day that his buddies will think he’s moved to another planet.
According to Thought Catalog, men love to hang with their friends so much they will cancel a dinner date to do so. No worries, dads. You can opt for alternatives now, like a Daddy & Me group playdate! Welcome to parenthood!
7 No Overtime At Work, Honey
Now men love to work and work a lot they do, which is one of the things you love about them. As per the Daily Mail, the average man works between 40 and 80 hours per week, especially if they have an extremely demanding career.
Well during those first six weeks, they will have to think of every excuse in the book as to why they have to head home by 7 pm instead of critiquing Tom’s project due the next day. Or if their coworkers have kids—they may actually garner a little sympathy in that department.
6 He'll Never Be Alone Again
As human beings we all need quiet time, to focus our thoughts, to escape the stresses of life—or to hear ourselves think. Men and women need that time just the same but handle it differently.
Women, without our quiet time, may turn into raving lunatics or do some serious shopping therapy—but men if they don’t get theirs, they won’t pay attention to a word we say at all, especially the important details like the when the light bill is due on Friday.
Men have a built-in mechanism for forgetting specific details of the conversation, per Every Day Health.
5 More Coffee, Dear?
Sleep deprivation is one of those most disturbing things that a person can endure. Healthline notes it can cause exhaustion, hallucinations, increased stress, and in some cases psychosis. New parents are known to get less than four hours of sleep on average during the newborns first weeks of life.
For mom, this may be a slight adjustment as she is used to rising with the roosters and turning in after everyone else. For Dad, it will be something that he isn’t accustomed to and never will be.
4 Mom's Impending Meltdown If It’s Not Done Just Right
Women want everything to be just right—why? because we are the masters at memorizing every detail, every color, every word of something or a situation. So, when Dad has to do everything for us, we undoubtedly expect them to get it right.
According to WomensForum, our hormones are all out of wack right after the baby is born until they are at least a month old, especially with the decrease in estrogen. So, if we send Dad out and he gets any little detail wrong, we may just flip out on him—but at least it’s not on purpose.
3 Round Two, Three, Four, And...
We all know that the grocery store is open 24 hours per day seven days per week, depending on where you live in the city. So, if the milk is running out it’s no problem, the toilet tissue is low, no problem, baby needs some more wipes, no problem. But just because the store is right around the corner—or all the way across town for some doesn’t mean that it's pleasant to go every other day.
One thing Dad will have to get used to is making those trips and sometimes that requires going for different things—or like any great shopper knows—different stores for the best deals on certain items. Forbes reports women go to at least two different stores on average to complete a shopping trip.
2 How Could You Forget?
So, this one will play out a million times over the next few months and Dad may end up hating himself for it. He went to the store and not just any store but the Sam’s Club 30 minutes outside of town and made it home after two hours of rush hour traffic—then right when he gets on your street he realizes that he forgot to bring you some orange juice or your favorite chocolate candy.
Yahoo notes that rush hour traffic has steadily increased from two hours per day to four hours each way on average.
1 PPD—For Dads
When we speak of postpartum depression we know that it usually affects just women, especially in those first few weeks—but more and more Dads are beginning to open up about how they feel during their time as a new parent and how difficult it is to adjust to such a lifestyle change.
According to PPM, Dads are ending up depressed too—just not as bad as their significant others. They may not know where to go for help or feel too embarrassed to do so. For most of them, they just act like there is nothing wrong, shake it off as being emotional or suffer in silence.
References: Very Well Family, How To Adult, The Bump, Happier Abroad, Huffington Post, Amazon, Momtastic, AlphaMom, Time, WEB MD, Daily Mail, Quora, Washington Post, Daily Mail, Thought Catalog, Daily Mail, Everyday Health, Healthline, Womens Forum, Forbes, Yahoo, Post Partum Men